One of the most common hauntings we see are family haunts. This is when a deceased family member or close friend decides to pay an extended visit or sometimes does not seem to want to move on. Now, spirits that love us often come by to check up on us, or support us in times of need or trauma, and this is fine, as this is a welcome and temporary visit. In many cases a family spirit is there to relay something important for the well being of their living loved ones. That is fine and they can and do act as guardian angels a lot of the time. In cases like that they come by for a brief time to try and help and then move on again. Family member spirits often come by over the holidays, or on a birthday etc. to project their love and check up on the family. These I have just mentioned are the majority of family haunting types that I see with my cases, but sometimes there are others which are very different. Unfortunately sometimes a spirit of a family member does not move on or comes back and for some reason decides they would rather stick around than move on. This is never a healthy situation for the spirit or the living family members involved. Spirits absorb energy from their surroundings and sometimes they absorb that energy unwittingly from the living people around them leaving them fatigued and even causing detriment to their health. At times children are scared by activity in the home or they may see the apparition and react with fear, causing them stress and even night terrors. We love our family members and especially if we are grieving, we might even welcome their presence in our home. This is understandable but it is not the best thing for everyone involved, even the spirit, if they take up permanent residence with the living.
Sometimes a person that was troubled in life remains troubled in the next life. Sometimes a family member although tolerated because they are family, may have been a not so nice person or someone with serious issues. Broken people often are broken spirits. In this case a family haunting can sometimes turn ugly after a period of time. Spirits who are angry or unhappy and also broken, do not realize or necessarily even care at times about the stress they inflict upon their living loved ones. If the spirit does not get what they want, or feels that the family might not be so receptive to their presence anymore, they can get angry and cause real problems. I have seen cases where people have been attacked and even terrorized by ghosts that were family members. When things get to this point, it is time to exercise some tough love. Time to take the matter firmly in hand and demand that this spirit leave the home and move on to wherever they need to go, in order to progress in the next life.
It is hard to believe that a family member or someone we loved could mean us harm. In the spirit state, people sometimes become confused. If the person died a violent death or is resentful of their untimely demise, they can be very enraged and just want to strike out in their frustration ,at not being able to finish their life here on earth. In this case they will try to maintain a pseudo life or existence in the world of the living, by trying to keep a communication and a presence in our worlds and in our lives. We, not wanting to hurt them or maybe even wanting to keep them near, will sometimes encourage this situation, often to the detriment of ourselves and the spirit involved. Often there are resentments and friction between certain family members and spirits sometimes take that well beyond the grave and return to continue acting on that friction or dislike of a family member. So, family hauntings are not always loving and watchful, but sometimes can turn volatile.
Spirits make new friends and form new attachments in the spirit world and they will at times, bring these friends along with them to take up residence in your home. Some of these spirits may not have the best intentions and they too, can bring you trouble. Spirits influence other spirits just as living people influence each other in this world. A spirit who has a beef may take up with another who encourages the spirit to act out and focus resentment on the living. The next world is a very complex thing. The best thing to do is not to encourage any spirit to stay indefinitely on this plane. From what I have seen, some spirits that do stay in the in between, for a long time eventually seem to develop some kind of dysfunction or negative emotional state that leads them to at times become hostile and or aggressive. Others fall into a sort of emotional trap of depression and obsession, where they are desperate to somehow return to the world of the living, this is how true spirit possession comes about. Spirits like this often integrate with someone that was close to them and allows this integration either consciously or unconsciously. This kind of integration is very bad for the living host. Grief over losing a loved one and sometimes even survivor guilt, can set someone up for this kind of integration, with a spirit that desperately wants to maintain one foot in this world, while existing in the next one.
I have recently been working two family haunt cases. One is simply a family haunt where a family member just wants to make the family aware of a situation that poses a threat to someone in the household. The other has gone sour and at this point the spirit has become hostile towards two people in the home, resulting in severe activity and even physical attack, upon two of the family members. Often one person in the household initially welcomes that spirit and another is not comfortable with the spirit's constant presence in the home. Once the spirit catches on that that one person does not want them there and the spirit is bonded with another member of the household, the spirit gets angry. The spirit often will then focus their rage on the person who does not want them there. Cases like these are why I wrote this article. People sometimes make mistakes with family spirits that lead to a very bad situation for all concerned.
Though we never really lose anyone to death, as they are still alive and can come and look in on us when ever they want, but they can not be with us and in our lives the way they used to be, when they were alive in the flesh. This is not what is meant to be and we can not bend all the rules from either side of the veil. When we try to do this it always turns sour. Love your loved ones beyond this life, but realize that they do have another life to move onto and that in the big picture that destiny is important for them. There is a reason for the barrier that exists between us and those how have passed into the next world. You can read more about that in the blog titled "The Barrier"